Almost every fortnight, I have an intuition of doing that one ‘rarest of the rare’ thing with an unsubstantiated hope of feeling better. A self-conceived hypothesis, that it would make me feel better about myself.
I had indubitably been an indispensable part of a few erroneous deeds. And today, I look up for redemption. An opportunity to consume rate all those fallacious conducts in an attempt to nullify their ghastly effect over the time. I am all optimistic about doing this rarest thing since I have those groundless perceptions that making it happen would change things around and help me become a better person as a whole. But, what holds me back is the lack of evidence. People never do this. Yes, people don’t. There must be some reason; not everybody around is gullible and foolish to accept things the conventional way. Am I doing the right thing? Would it actually make things better or all this is a work of my own fantasized hallucination? Well, I am not aware. I just know, that forgiving people helps you in becoming a better person and apologizing is one thing you should exercise as and when possible. Holding grudges against someone is more like ruining up your own self. And, I believe I have been educated enough to not hold grudges, to be humble enough to apologize and the rest. So, I must definitely do this rarest thing, even if it will take all my strength and courage. After all, it had taken all my strength and courage to do those erroneous deeds too. So, Yes I’ll do that rarest thing. Although, I am not ensured success here, yet I’d do it and put in all my effort since I have an utterly strong feeling that it would make me feel better about myself.
Now that I have resolved to do this. I need to think upon a few things so that I don’t end up creating fallacious circumstances for myself all over again. Well!, the mere objective is redemption for the wrong I had done in the past. It is going to be some real tough stuff. I need to contain a lot of perseverance, strength and determination. I cannot afford to be a coward and pen down things to avoid confrontations. I need to face it up directly at one go and at the same time withheld myself from elucidating the events that have occurred in the past. Most importantly, I must have faith upon myself and on God. With these few precautions, I must go ahead rollickingly and get this done sometime around Moksha.